we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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