The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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