You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
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