I wanna passion pit in your ass
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize