Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
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He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
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