remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
