I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
