he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
worst night to have a conscience
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You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
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Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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