he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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