The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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