that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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