Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
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You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
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I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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