She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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