Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
did you just send me my own nude
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
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