Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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