you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
