well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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