he shaved USA in his pubs
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize