He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
