Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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