Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
