This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize