Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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