i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
