Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
