Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
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