You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I'm going to jail i love you
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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