apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
I party with great urgency now.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
