we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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