He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
