just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.