Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Randomize
