coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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