I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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