Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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