so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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