saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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