i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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