oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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