I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
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