I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
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