My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
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