Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Randomize
