You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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