I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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