Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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