party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
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