when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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