You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
