you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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